Pocketful of Froggies and Fish Fry to Pacify

She was barely four, but quite aware of her surroundings and senses – including flavors and food her Mum would create. She was choosy about food and almost never ate anything which had a “health” tag attached to it necessary for children her age. Her parents would cry hoarse to the kiddie doctor they took her to. Who would in turn tell the harried parents that their child was normal.

She wrote her Cs and Ds all mirror images of the actual letters of the alphabet in her strangely beautiful handwriting. She strung a wooden guitar quite tunelessly, she even stole sausages from the fridge while the Mum was asleep one day. She never played with dolls and kitchen sets little girls her age did. She loved to dig into hills of sand at construction sites, one time even coming back home with a piece of dried cat poop in her hand and giving it to her Mum as a present for home decoration. She once hit the family’s domestic help so hard with a steel rod, he bled from the forehead. Just because he had refused to give her atta dough to play with.

All the signs were there. The parents were bringing up a Problem Child. And they could not even put her up for adoption!

But outside of her home, the Brat was the most well-behaved little girl, who even knew her nursery rhymes and number songs. So no one really believed the parents when they told tales of the brat they had at home.

Encouraged by the sporadic good behavior of the little girl outside of home, the parents started having eat outs and dinner parties at home.

That monsoon evening a few friends of the parents were invited. The Mother was busy with cooking her signature dishes, the Father was the babysitter. Later, they cleared the clutter together, tidied the home, fluffed up the pillows, made the house smell good and dressed their daughter up in a frilly frock the Mother had stitched.

Friends came, conversations started over drinks and food. Brat got some applauds for the new poems she had learnt at  nursery school after which she was left on her own to sit on her wooden horse or play around. Sneaking out to the garden was easy for the Brat.

She returned to the living room and stood in front of the guests, waiting to be noticed. Her cheek was pinched by some “Aunty”, but no one really noticed her taking handful of little frogs from the pockets of her frock and hurling them at the guests sitting on the big couch.

Frog after frog came out of her pockets, some escaping her little hands but most made it to where they were aimed at. Shrieks and shrills echoed the living room and then a firm hand picked the Brat up and put her down on the big, rocking chair.

Silence enveloped the room and then suddenly all the adults got busy looking for hopping, jumping frogs. The Brat looked gleefully at the Mother who was glaring back at her. The largish rocking chair’s slight back and forth motion ensured that the Brat did not get off it for the next 30 minutes or so. The Mother wiped her hands and asked her if she was hungry. The Brat nodded and the Mother handed her a piece of crispy-fried Fish Fry with tomato ketchup smeared on it.

The Brat licked the sauce with satisfied delight and then her tiny teeth bit into the flaky fish. She liked it, finished it in no time and reached her little hand for another! Which the Mother handed over only too eagerly. At least her four-year-old was eating something. Which meant the Mother was going to make Bhetki Maacher Fry for the Brat for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Ingredients for the Mother’s Fish Fry are:

500 grams fish fillet (use any white fish, my Mum uses Bhetki {Red Snapper} in India)
Juice of two lemons or limes
2 tablespoons juice of red onion (grate an onion and extract the juice)
1 teaspoon black pepper powder
1 egg, beaten
3-4 tablespoons cornstarch
3-4 tablespoons bread crumbs
Canola oil for deep frying
Salt

Cut the fillets in smaller three inch pieces and marinate them in the lemon and onion juices, salt and pepper for about 30-40 minutes. Make sure the fish you use is fresh, else it might just start breaking when you deep fry it.

In a wok, heat oil till almost smoking.

Drain the juices from the fish and coat with cornstarch, dip in the egg batter and roll in the bread crumbs. Deep fry. The rule for “battered” deep frying is: dry-wet-dry, I learnt this from a chef and watched most follow this simple rule.

Fry the fish till the crust becomes golden brown. Adjust the heat if the oil gets too hot.

Drain the fish on paper towels and serve immediately with onion rings, tomato ketchup and kasundi (a Bengali mustard relish).

Bacon and Egg Pots

There are some things that I can only fantasize about. Like breakfast in bed. But what is possible though is I let someone else make my breakfast. My trusted oven! And see how.

Ingredients for Bacon and Egg Pots are:

Strips of bacon, 3-4 for each ramekin
1-2 eggs per each person
Finely chopped fresh parsley or chives
Sprinkle of freshly cracked black pepper
Half teaspoon butter

Throw the bacon strips in a skillet and cook till they are dark pink in color, but not crisp. Drain them on paper towels.

Line each ramekin with a little butter on your fingers. Place one or two strips of bacon at the base and another on the sides, making a “ bacon cup” inside the ramekin.

Crack an egg or two over the bacon base. Crack some black pepper over it.

Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees. Place all the ramekins on a water bath and bake for 15-18 minutes or unless the eggs are set and the whites visible.

Garnish with fresh herbs like parsley or chives and serve with slices of bread, OJ, chai or coffee.

Crawl back in bed with your tray of breakfast and enjoy! Looks like breakfast in bed is possible after all.

More breakfast ideas are here.

Yours Sincerely, Bhaat-e-Sheddo-Bhaat

A Bengali has some off moments in between his Ilish and Kosha Mangsho days! Its usually the day after he has had a meal of daal, chorchori, bhaja, guli kebab, macher kalia, murgir jhol, followed by a big bowl of ras malai!

The next morning after a few green pearly pills of Pudin Hara and some nasty cho-n-aa dhekur, he is finally ready to give his stomach some rest.

Its then that our Bengali walks up to his doting Mother in his white Robin-liquid-blue-washed pyjamas and sando genji, continuously caressing his belly and says, aaj kichu khabo na. (Meaning I have gas, stomach ache and indigestion and I expect to be treated like a King!)

A whining son and a fretting Mother make instant connection in a Bengali home.

On cue, Mommy starts to fan him with her haath pakha, stroking his receding hairline, and complaining at the same time how he has lost weight. Overnight.

Her love overflows and she immediately orders all cooking at home to be stopped! Its a sort of an emergency declared. Her 40-year-old needs her immediate attention and also her slow-cooked phena bhaat with some alu sheddo, deem sheddo, daal sheddo, bhindi sheddo, and all things boiled and mashed! A baby food for a 40-year-old.

Pots of rice, potatoes, eggs, and Mushurir dal are fired up. The Mother stirs them to perfection – the right consistency is verrrrry important, she will nod to herself.

Pure gawa ghee is poured in a little bowl and melted. Ghani shorshe tel is brought out from the bhaandar. The servant is ordered to pluck fresh green chilies from the backyard.

Boiled potatoes and eggs are peeled and mashed with mustard oil, broken green chilies and salt.

The boiled Mushurir daal is zinged up with some more mustard oil and green chilies.

The rice, overcooked to perfection has to be served piping hot. Smoldering ghee takes overcooked rice to the next level.

The baby food is now ready for the Bengali.

This meal will now ready the Bengali for an evening snack of shingara-jilipi and a dinner of noodles and Chili Chicken, maybe some golden fried prawns too.

Dimer Devil or Bengali Deviled Eggs

I stumbled upon this hilarious limerick, which was once doing the rounds in the cyber world. May I request you to read it with some passion and empathy for the poet. It apparently is written by a some inane Bengali school teacher, who has chosen to remain anonymous. And I can understand why!

Through the jongole I am went
On shooting Tiger I am bent
Boshtaard Tiger has eaten wife
No doubt I will avenge poor darling's life.
Too much quiet, snakes and leeches.
But I not fear these sons of beeches.
Hearing loud noise I am jumping with start
But noise is coming from damn fool's heart
Taking care not to be fright
I am clutching rifle tight with eye to sight.
Should Tiger come I will shoot and fall him down,
Then like hero return to native town.
Then through trees I am espying one cave ,
I am telling self - "Banerjee be brave"
I am now proceeding with too much care
From far I smell this Tiger's lair
My leg shaking, sweat coming, I start pray
I think I will shoot Tiger some other day.
Turning round I am going to flee
But Tiger giving bloody roar spotting Bengalee
He bounding from cave like footballer Pele
I run shouting "Kali Ma tumi kothay gele"
Through the jongole I am running
With Tiger on my tail closer looming
I am a telling that never in life
I will risk again for my damn wife!!!!

But what all wife-loving, o-phiss-going Bengali dutifully does is bring back deep-fried Dimer Devil for his wife for the evening jol-khabar.

Dimer Devil or Deviled Eggs (Bengali style) is minced meat (sometimes even vegetables) stuffed with boiled egg. The word "deviled" is applied to a multitude of spicy dishes. The culinary world defines "deviled" as “food grilled or fried after coating with condiments or breadcrumbs”. Which is close to this traditional Bengali recipe.

To get some egg on egg action happening, I will try and write down this recipe in steps so that its easy for your to understand.

Ingredients for Dimer Devil are:

4 hard boiled eggs, cut into halves

For the mince meat coating:

250 grams mince meat (beef or goat meat)
2 medium size potatoes, boiled
Half cup crispy fried onions (I used readymade)
Handful of chopped coriander
4-5 green chilies, very finely chopped
1 heaped tablespoon of ginger-garlic paste
Half teaspoon garam masala (clove, cinnamon, black and green cardamom powdered together)
2 bay leaves
Quarter teaspoon of black pepper powder
Quarter teaspoon red chili powder
Salt

Cook the mince meat with little water, bay leaf, ginger-garlic paste, black pepper and red chili powder. Dry up all moisture and discard the bay leaves. Leave to cool.

Mash together the boiled potatoes, fried onion, coriander, green chilies, garam masala powder, and salt.
Add to the mixture the cooked mince meat and mix well. Use your hands, they work the best. 
 
For the final step:

2-3 tablespoons corn starch
Enough bread crumb
1 egg, beaten
Oil for deep frying

Take each halved egg between your hands, dust it with a little corn starch and start shaping the mince meat mixture around it, giving it a natural oval shape. They should be reasonably sized, enough bite to get satisfied with a couple of them for each person.
Roll each first on the corn starch, then dip in the egg batter and lastly on the bread crumb. Dust any extra bread crumb. Keep aside. You could prepare this and keep in the fridge and deep fry just before serving.

Heat oil in a wok. Deep fry each Deviled Egg till golden brown.
It is rumored that the Dimer Devil is top in the world of chop-kat-let! Its time you too took eggs where no egg has gone before and make this very seductive symphony of eggs and mince meat.

Serve your Dimer Devil with thin slices of onion and tomato ketchup. I served mine today with some chopped salad and rustic fries or like they say in Bengali – finger chips.

Freestyle Savory Dalia

I am a gobbler for comfort food in a bowl. Whether its grass root or gourmet. Or something in between. Its the way you look at a bowl of freestyle Dalia (broken wheat) fortified with vegetables.

My Mum-in-law makes this during winters and serves each bowl of savory Dalia with a hard-boiled egg. And freshly cracked pepper for special effects.

Believe me when I say it cannot get healthier from here.  I used to down a bowl of steaming hot Dalia and an egg before going to work in absolutely no time! I’d come back home and check if there were any leftovers. It is that good.

Ingredients for Freestyle Savory Dalia are:

1 cup dalia/broken wheat
Quarter cup green peas
Half a red onion, chopped
1 carrot cut into small pieces
Handful of green beans, cut into very small pieces
One knob of ginger, cut coarsely
Two green chilies, chopped (optional, if making for kids)
One tablespoon ghee + extra to drizzle later (use unsalted butter if you don’t have ghee)
Salt
Hard-boiled eggs (optional)

Wash the broken wheat to clean off any dirt. Drain water. Though I have cut my vegetables in small pieces, you can cut them any which ways. After all the name is freestyle.

In a saucepan, add the washed broken wheat, vegetables, ginger, ghee and salt. Add enough water to cover all the ingredients. Cook uncovered till the vegetables are done but not mushy.

Ginger adds a very nice pungency to the boiled vegetables and wheat. I would say its the essential item in this dish. You can use any seasonal vegetables for this recipe.

Drizzle some ghee and serve a bowlful of this healthy Dalia with sliced boiled eggs.

Frenchified With Maple Crème Brûlée

Maybe, just maybe if you ever thought this Bengali could not do any French cuisine, I am going to dispel that stereotype today. Like the French, we Bengalis think, talk and eat a lot of food. Like the French, food is a ritual for us, an art. And when I say food is an establishment for both the Bengalis and the French, I am not in the least bit exaggerating.

My knowledge of the French language starts and ends with oui, and maybe an occasional bonjour and merci since I have moved to Canada. And my initiation to gourmet French cooking is only as recent as last year -- thanks to the double dose of Julie and Julia and French Food At Home hosted by Laura Calder. I love watching her on Food Network every morning. Even more, I love her kitchen and her chic wrap around dresses! Okay, I have a vague feeling I am digressing.  So I will move back to my attempt of making Crème Brûlée (French for “burnt cream”), an easy French dessert I once saw Laura Calder make. Her recipe had sugar, I have substituted it with maple syrup. Which we find here in abundance.
I started by having all the ingredients and measurements for the Maple Crème Brûlée (pronounced krehm broo-lay) right -

2 cups of heavy cream
Half cup maple syrup
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 tablespoons sugar
2 egg yolks
2 eggs 

Start by heating the heavy cream and maple syrup in a saucepan. I stopped just before boiling and removed from the heat. In a mixing bowl, whisk the egg yolks, eggs and the vanilla extract. Slowly start adding the cream-syrup mixture, stirring continuously. Adding little by little of the hot cream mixture is the way to go since we do not want to scramble the eggs.
Transfer the mixture onto individual ramekins (or custard cups) – I used all four for this quantity of cream and eggs. Place the ramekins in a baking dish and pour enough water to reach halfway of the ramekins. Water baths are mainly used for baking, as this technique helps to cook evenly and prevents cracking.
Preheat oven to 350°F and bake till the liquid mixture sets around the edges but jiggly at the center. This should take about 40-45 minutes.
I cooled them to a room temperature (in the same water bath), and then chilled them.
Just before serving, I sprinkled them with some sugar (plain white) and put them in the broiler for about two minutes or less to melt all that sugar. But do keep an eye on it, don't leave it in. Else you might just end up getting a crisp, charcoal topping on your crème. The broiler worked for me since I do not have a blowtorch. This way I got the creamy custard base and the top crust of caramel.
Elegant and easy. Looks like I will just go ahead and pat my back when no one is looking!
Bon Appétit. Just the way Julia “Meryl” Child says it!